Newborn Days

Zachary's newborn days were all a little tough. We started out with jaundice which was seemingly caused by me and him having different blood types. I guess this is a thing??? I had never heard of it. I thought his bilirubin levels would never stay down and we would never stop going to the lab to get his foot pricked. Alas, it finally went away and he was ok. Around the time he was a month old he started wanting to nurse a lot, and very often. I went to my lactation consultant and she saw he was only taking in 1 oz each time he nursed, which meant he was hungry after only an hour and we were nursing all day long. She was pretty sure he had a tongue tie. She referred us to a dentist in Denver who specialized in tongue and lip ties. We were desperate so we drove up there. He saw Zachary had a tongue and lip tie and revised them both with a laser that day. He nursed again after the procedure and I could tell he was doing better right away. We had to do specific stretches with him every few hours to make sure they didn't grow back. It was tough, but worth it for my baby to be able to eat right. His weight never went crazy and got extra high or anything, he will always just be a little guy. That's the way God made him. 

 Enjoy some cute newborn pictures of my little guy.

10 weeks...

     That is how long I got to carry my sweet fifth child inside me. Oh how wonderful it was. I truly LOVE being pregnant. No matter how bad I feel, having new life inside me is so wonderful.
      In October of 2014 we had an early loss; so I was much more guarded this time around about telling people. And for the last year we had hoped and prayed that the Lord would bless us again. And He did. We kept it quiet from the kids so they wouldn't have to endure heartbreak again. We went to our first ultrasound where the baby measured exactly to the day on schedule.We saw the flickering of that heartbeat and took a deep sigh of relief. So, we finally told the kids on Halloween. They were sooo excited. I think the only people who love new babies in our family more than me are my kids!!
     My husband took off during his lunch hour to accompany me to my monthly doctors appt. They were very busy that day and it seemed to take forever for them to come into the room. My midwife got out her doppler and tried to find our baby's heartbeat. She told me not to worry, because it was still a little early to hear it good on the doppler. The ultra sound tech had left for the day, but my midwife turned on the machine so we could have some reassurance before coming home. Oh how I wish that is what we got.
     She tried for a couple minutes to find a heartbeat but it never happened. She told me she was sorry, but she couldn't get one. She handed us a picture of our baby and had us make an appt for Monday to have an ultrasound with the tech and make sure she hadn't missed something. My husband called a co-worker and had him cover the rest of his classes for the day so he could go home with me. I don't remember much from that weekend. Except laying in bed, sobbing. And searching for a little bit of hope on the internet of other's who have gone through something similar and their babies were ok.
     Monday afternoon came and we were told what we already knew. Our baby had passed away sometime the week before. The baby measured still almost exactly the right size for the gestation of my pregnancy. I asked why that would be and she said the baby was probably just measuring ahead and was bigger for it's age. They asked what we would like to do: Go home and wait to go into labor on my own (which could take a few days to a few weeks), take some medicine that causes it to happen within a day or two, or I could have a D & C surgery in a couple days. We chose the surgery so it would be quick and mostly painless. And I wouldn't need to worry about being home with the kids when it would happen.
     It was the day before Thanksgiving when I went in. I was at a new hospital I had never been to before as more than a visitor. I had a doctor performing the surgery that was nice but I didn't know her well. I see the midwife at the practice and she cannot perform the surgery. The nurses were all so very nice and I had the best experience that could be expected.We had to sign a form stating the time of death for our baby. (Which just pisses me off that these pro-choice crazies always say it isn't a life until it's born- well I beg to differ because how can something die that was never alive??) The last thing I remember after getting into the operating room was the Dr asking me the ages of my other children. I remember telling her but that was all. When I woke up I was sobbing. I slightly remember saying "I just want my baby back". And then more sobbing. I think I cried close to an hour. I had finally settled down and my husband came in, and then more crying.
     About an hour after that they were sending us on our way. We drove thru Arby's on the way home because I was starving and still having those hormonal cravings. (a cruel joke when you no longer have your baby inside you) My mom was staying with the kids and stayed the night to help if needed and to cook. She is amazing by the way. She kept us all fed for a couple weeks, when I couldn't get out of bed or muster up the energy to do anything.

                                                         A picture of our sweet baby!!

     I was happy my husband was also home all the rest of the week for Thanksgiving break. That holiday will never be the same for me. We were able to have our baby tested to see if there was anything wrong that caused it to die. I am thankful for technology because it has helped bring us closure. We finally got the results back and found out our baby had nothing chromosomally wrong with him. And that our baby was a sweet little boy. Oh how he would have had so much fun with our big boys!! What a ruckus they would have caused in our semi-quiet household. (Even with four kids they are quiet children so we just don't have a noisy house-maybe one day that will change)
     We have decided to name our third son because he was so loved and wanted. We chose the name Timothy for him because it means Honoring God- oh how I hope talking about his short little life will be honoring to the Lord. We chose David for his middle name because it means BELOVED. And boy was he LOVED. His life was short but he was loved fiercely. Every night after our big kids learned of his upcoming arrival they prayed for him. My husband had taught our littlest to look in my belly button for the baby- we all thought that was pretty funny!!
     I don't know why our sweet boy was taken from us, I never will. I think the Lord must need him up in Heaven more than I needed him on earth. It still doesn't ease the heartbreak and sadness for us. Yes I have four healthy children but I would take a hundred if the Lord saw fit. No matter how many kids a person has, losing one is not any easier. A LOT of women go through this I have found out upon researching. 1 in 4 pregnancies ends in miscarriage. I had 4 healthy pregnancies before going through this, for that I am blessed. I would never wish it upon anyone and hope to never go through it again. I do have hope though. Hope in the Lord. I do not know what the future holds for our "little" family- I pray it is for more children running around but my ways are not God's ways.

Ecclesiastes 11:5 says this, " As you do not know the path of the wind, or how the body is formed in a mother's womb, so you cannot understand the work of God, the Maker of all things."

The BIGGEST mistake of our lives & a journey back to fertility

Psalm 137 3-5 
Children are a gift from the Lord;
they are a reward from him.
Children born to a young man
are like arrows in a warrior’s hands.
How joyful is the man whose quiver is full of them!

In order to tell you about the biggest mistake of our lives (in our opinion) I will give you a back story leading up to it.  I have been praying about whether or not to share this with the "world" or continue to keep it private amongst a few family members and a handful of friends, and I continue to feel led to sharing our story.

In the summer of 2003 my parents were loading up their moving truck to move to Colorado. I had been wondering if something was up with me for a couple days, and decided that afternoon to head to our apartment and take a "test". It was positive. I went back to my parents house to tell my husband, "you remember that thing we were talking about?", him- "ya", me- "it was positive", him- "oh" with a deer in the headlights look.

This was not in our life plan!!! Jeff was supposed to finish school, we were both supposed to work for a couple years to pay off debt and save money to buy a house. We kept it to ourselves for a few days as we helped drive my parents and their stuff out to Colorado. After telling my parents and feeling the relief of their support we felt better about things. And in April of 2004 we welcomed Mr. Colby into the world! What fun I had with that boy! (and still do) We knew I was going to be a stay at home mom, and I have always loved every minute of it!

When Colby turned 1 we knew we wanted to add to the family and have kiddos close together. We always said we wanted 2 or 3 kids. It took a grueling 3 months to get pregnant, but it finally happened and we were so excited. I was REALLY hoping for a girl, because i have always had a super close relationship with my mom and wanted to have the same with my own daughter. At the anatomy scan when I was half way through my pregnancy they told us we were having a baby girl- and I was so happy- I was literally sobbing in the ultrasound room. In February of 2006 miss Hallie (Hal-e) Jane was born!!

When Hallie was about 1 we decided it was time for another baby! So we got busy ;-) and well he basically just looked at me and I was pregnant again. And lo and behold another baby girl was on the way! In January of 2008 Miss Sadie came into the world.

At this point we had a 3 yr old, an almost 2 year old and a newborn...overwhelmed much??

Since the thing to do seemed to be get a vasectomy and not have to worry- we scheduled the appointment. No one discouraged us not to. No one said are you sure- this is a big decision. At this point though I am not sure I would have listened. We were overwhelmed with little ones, in a whole lotta debt, and I was dealing with minor PPD. So we made the appointment and Jeff had a vasectomy when Sadie was only 2 months old.

Fast forward 2 years. We have paid off most of that whole lotta debt...and I started getting an itch. An itch only women can relate to. (no not that kind of itch) a baby itch! The 3 we had were bigger and more responsible- we are homeschooling now, so no reason to get the kids off to school so I can go back to work. So I mentioned to Jeff that I wanted a baby and he laughed. A few months later I brought it up again (I am at this point fully aware its not possible but still talking about it) and he said "We played God and now we have to deal with it". OUCH! He was right though. We did play God. Why in the world would be break something that should never have been broken in the first place? Why would we take matters into our own hands and not keep Jeff the way God made him? We had a lot to think about.

I knew vasectomy reversals were expensive. We have known people that had them and they are not covered by insurance, and they cost over 10k dollars. So not an option for us. Although I decided to check out google anyways and see what was out there. I researched them a little and found a few doctors that did them at discounted rates. One was in Oklahoma. That was a day's drive away. And it was only $1,700. So I prayed..A LOT! And another few months later I brought it up to Jeff again..and guess what he told me. "I have always wanted more kids"- what?!?!??! Why in the world did we get a vasectomy then?!? Can't change that.

Now we were on the same page. We both felt led by God to start the process of booking the appointment and getting this all figured out. We were gonna get my husband FIXED!!!! He was truly broken. Dr. Wilson seemed too good to be true though with his low price of $1,700. So I researched him more, and found a great site on Baby Center full of women who have gone through the same thing raving about this Dr. He talks fast they said (they weren't kidding- remember the micro machine guy commercials?? ya faster than that!!) he doesn't have many people skills...nope didn't but he was good at his job. He does 3 surgeries a day and used to be a heart surgeon. So he is good at reconnecting small tubes. Even though Dr. Wilson's fee's were cheaper then most it was still a lot of money for us to come up with. Jeff did our taxes and guess what?? There was JUST ENOUGH of our refund left over for us to get this surgery done- so blessed! And feeling like we are still following the Lord's plan for us.

We knew there was only two days we were available to go get this surgery done, so we needed to score an appt. on the EXACT day and time we were able to be there. Dr. Wilson keeps his prices low by having an online scheduling system and no secretary. And he was booked 3 months in advance. I knew the day that the next available day would open up and had to act fast because the appointments get taken within minutes of opening up. Long story short but we got the EXACT day AND time we needed. Whew! Thank you God.

We had our trip planned and knew we had to take the kids. This was going to be interesting. We couldn't tell them what was going on- they wouldn't understand. Colby had just turned 7 so we just told them daddy needed a surgery on his leg.(HA!) The whole trip went off without a hitch, the kids did great, and Jeff was in pain but we all made it home alive the next day after LOTS of driving.

We did get a little bad news. For only being 3 years from having had a vasectomy the Dr. gave us the worst chances of sperm returning. Only 60%. And 40% chance of actually getting pregnant. We didn't let it get us down though. We tried, and tried, and tried. And nuthin.

I went to the doctor and found out I had hypothyroid- a cause for infertility. Took care of that- levels are normal now. And still nuthin.

For the last 14 months we have continued to have Faith and Trust that the Lord brought us down this path for a reason. If nothing else, our marriage is stronger. It has to be. Infertility sucks. I have a deep respect now for women who go through this for years. I might end up being one of them. And it's sad. And really lonely. Not many understand. And when you see pregnant people EVERYWHERE,  Facebook postings, and lots of cute teeny tiny adorable babies- it really sucks that none of them are yours. And don't get me wrong I am always SO happy for my friends and family having these blessings- but I'm not gonna lie- its REALLY hard. I have cried out to God trying to figure out why He brought us down this path and we are still not pregnant. He continues to tell me to wait. So I will. Just a few nights ago I was asking the Lord why another month has gone by of tests with only 1 line and as I was reading my Bible the verse I was reading said this, "You of little Faith, why did you doubt?" He knew I was going to fall apart, and I did. Thankfully it didn't last long and I was back to having Faith and trusting that He knows the right time for us and I will wait.

I will admit this process has changed me. I have more patience, I rely on the Lord for direction more, but I am also a little more sad sometimes. So if I have seemed different, its probably because of this process we have been going through. I enjoy the 3 babies I already have immensely, they are my world and always cheer me up when I am feeling down. Thankfully I hide it well and the kids are not effected.

We have had Jeff tested and he fell into the 60%- he is fixed, things are back to normal. We continue to pray and ask God to bless us again. Our children ask God every night for a new baby. And sometimes I hope someone will decide to just give me one! We have looked into adoption- we simply can't afford it, we have looked into foster care- they say our house isn't big enough. Doors slammed shut, so we are 99% sure those are not paths we can go down right now.

If anything I have learned that I will advocate to anyone and everyone to not get a vasectomy. Do something less permanent. Or don't do anything at all. Children are a blessing. We will no longer use birth control and "play God". We will accept all the blessings the Lord wants to give us. Of course at this point- one more would be awesome! Remember us in your prayers- we would greatly appreciate it.

My first American made car!!!

We got home on Thursday super late...so took our time getting our act together Friday to get out to do some car shopping. I needed time to re-group. Grammy came over  about lunch time so we could see what we could find. The kids were SUPER concerned that we wouldn't be able to go to church on Sunday without a car..and they do not sell cars here on Sundays- so we knew we wanted to find something on Friday or Saturday. If we didn't no biggie- we would figure things out. Thankfully Jeff is on his last week of summer break. We weren't sure what we were looking for- we knew we didn't want another Honda Odyssey. Of the years we could afford we found out transmission problems are a BIG problem. There was a class action suit against Honda because of them as well as a big article in the New York times about how many problems they have had with the transmissions. Before this all happened I would have sworn up and down that the Odyssey was the way to go when looking for a mini-van. Now...not so much!

So off we went to some dealerships...UGH I HATE CAR SHOPPING...I would rather someone beat me!!! I had a bad attitude the first day...we decided to look at anything with a 3rd row..and I wanted some cargo space. Any vans we looked into either cost more then we wanted to get a loan for or were trashy/smelly! So I was pretty against vans. Jeff wanted a Suburban but I wasn't sure about the size factor. I did tell him if we were going to get one it had to have 2 rows of back seats so that we would have seating for 8- if I was going to drive that big thing around I wanted to cram as many people in as we could!! I test drove a big red one that was very nice- they guy told us it was 14,000 but they may be able to come down to 10,000...I thought it was odd they could come down so low. We told him we would think about it and call him the next day. That night we got online and searched Autotrader.com and found that Suburban listed from that dealership for 9,900...WHAT!?? I HATE CAR SHOPPING!!!!

The next morning we were up and at-em again...we looked at a couple places. I test drove a GMC Envoy- it was very nice but the cargo space was nothing. As someone who would need to use the 3rd row all the time there is a slim to none chance I could ever grocery shop with the kids in tow. Even though I didn't love it, we put it on our short list because there was not much out there. People are just not trading in big cars these days because our pickin's were slim. The next couple places we went were totally honest and said they had nothing that fit what we wanted for the price we wanted...so we moved on.

Jeff had found a couple listing's for Suburbans in Castle Rock and Denver- so we made the decision to head up there. We test drove a very nice one in Castle Rock- the used car dealership was a bit low budget- but they were nice. After about 5 minutes in the car though we could smell it...the failed attempt to cover up the fact that the previous owner was a smoker. UGH- another one bites the dust! And up to Denver we head!! We found a listing on USAA.com for a nice Suburban in our price range. We went, we test drove, we haggled..and we purchased!! Our OTD price was a wee bit higher then we hoped..but they filled up the gas tank and it was everything we wanted!

And here she is!!! (I need to name her!)

We are very happy with our Suburban thus far..and know it will serve us well in the future. We are happy that it does have 8 seatbelts...I babysit a little gal 5 afternoons a week so I usually have 4 kiddos in the car..and we hope to grow our family in the future as well so this leaves us lots of room!!

And this is my very FIRST American made car- my first car was an OLD Toyota Corolla, my second was a Honda Civic hatchback, next was my Honda Civic Sedan, then my Honda Odyssey...I was pretty brand loyal! Hopefully American treats me right!!!

A HUGE Snafu...Part 2.

For the first part of this story check out A HUGE Snafu...part 1


We made our way the 10 seconds to the mechanic that was recommended to us. 3 guys were just sitting around in a small office when Jeff explained the situation. At this point the kids were still in the car. The guys popped the hood and checked out the oil since that seemed to be the situation at this point. It was still super low- like almost none...how could that be when Jeff just put in 4 quarts...they asked for the van's owners manual. They realized what everyone thought was the oil dipstick was the transmission fluid dipstick..so they found the oil dipstick way in the back and boy was it full!! About 4 quarts too much!! At this point we realize the transmission fluid is REALLY low and that its most likely something to do with that. The guys got busy and looked under the car and took the wheel off and were trying to see what they could find. About this point I realized these guys don't do big jobs, and they try to stay away from foreign cars...our van is a Honda Odyssey. I got the kids out of the car and we all decided to find some food. They recommended a pizza place (best pizza in Wyoming they told us)...we checked it out and decided to pass because the cost for all of us to eat there was going to be a lot and we knew we were facing some major expenses with the car repairs. Instead we headed to the gas station and grabbed some hot dogs. This was our only other option food wise. When we got back to the shop one of the guys was holding a part of some kind..stripped of something..and the transmission fluid was mixed with oil and metal shavings. The car would not change gears and basically we needed a new transmission. LOVELY!

The mechanic looked up the cost of getting a rebuilt transmission, a new transmission, and so on...we would have to tow the van to Cheyenne Wyoming which is about 120 miles away...and the tow would have cost $3.50-$4 a mile...our insurance would have covered up to 24 miles. The new tranny would cost roughly $4000 including installation. We looked up the blue book value on the van and in excellent condition sold to a private owner it was worth $5250. And my van was not in excellent condition!! So after lots of OMG what should we do and phone calls to family members we decided to sell the van to a scrap yard and cut our losses. Sad- I will miss my van!!

Now...we are 5 people with a whole lotta camping equipment...how in the world do we get home. In Lusk, Wyoming there are no buses that stop there, no taxi cabs...no nuthin! I had talked to my mom and put her on stand by for renting a car to come get us the next day- this was our first option. Our second option was the mechanic said his wife could drive us to the Cheyenne airport where we would rent a car and drive it one way home. He called his wife and she was not willing to do that alone- I would have been the same way if my husband called to tell me that. So he finally said he would drive us when he got off work at 5. So I called the car rental place and got something reserved- they closed at 730 but he gave me his cell number to call him if it was past 730 and he would get us a car.

Jeff started packing things into the mechanic's Suburban and getting car seats installed and so forth. We trashed some stuff like everything in the cooler that was no longer cool...and some other random things. The mechanic closed his shop early and we all loaded up. We stopped by his house to pick up his wife, who was super nice. They have 5 children- ages 17-8. And off we went!! All 3 kids slept the entire 2.5 hrs it took to get there. We rolled in a few minutes before 7:30 and picked up our "car". It was a Suburban.(After all was said and done it cost $350 to rent that thing and leave it here in the Springs) We were able to transfer stuff super quick and say goodbye to the mechanic and his wife. We filled up their tank before we left and I offered them some money for their time, but they wouldn't take it. We ended up signing the car over to them and let them get the money from a scrap place..not much maybe $300.(they have to wait for someone to come thru town asking if anyone has scrap cars- so we couldn't wait around) They said they were going to donate it to their church. I never asked what church, but I am 99% sure they are part of the LDS community. I'm sure the money will be put to good use.

We were loaded up and headed to Sonic for some dinner at 8PM. They have a sit down inside one in Cheyenne, so it was nice to feel a little relaxed and eat food- I had eaten a cliff bar all day. We had a pleasant drive home and rolled in about 7 hours later than planned at 11PM. Home sweet home never felt so good!!!

I have no pictures from this wild ride- never stopped to think about getting out the camera!!

And BTW- I still don't know what God was trying to tell me through all this- I will let you know when I know!!

A HUGE Snafu...part 1

We took a road trip last week and headed up to South Dakota to go camping and see the sites. One of those being Mt. Rushmore...we had a great week. Absolutely perfect weather for tent camping- best ever for us! Everyone transitioned well into sleeping in the tent, we had very little melt downs and an over-all super fun time together. We even talked about hoping to get a pop up camper in the next year or so and doing more road trips to the east coast and maybe Florida. I will post pictures later this week of all the fun stuff we did.

We headed home Thursday morning- we got the van all loaded up and went to leave and couldn't find the car keys. My absent minded husband had rolled them up in the tent..which was now in the car-top carrier at the bottom. We needed to be leaving for the 8 hour trip home, so we used the spare car keys and asked my parents to unlock a back door for us. I should have known then, that the trip home was going to be tricky.

We camped in Custer State Park and roaming around the park at all times are wild buffalo. We learned a lot about them while there and got some good pictures. As we were winding our way out of the park we saw a male buffalo in the middle of the road. Just sauntering along, taking his time. I told Jeff to roll down the window cause I wanted to get a good picture. He did. As we were rolling up the window and slowing making our way past Mr. Buffalo he started to chase the van and I screamed "GO GO GO!!!!!" Jeff was able to get going pretty quick and the Buffalo gave up. We learned that Buffalo can run 55 MPH...so we knew we needed to haul it quick! This was another sign that our trip home was not going to be pleasant!

Here he is as we were trying to drive past.

The shot i got before he started running!

We drove for a couple hours- mostly in the middle of nowhere. Sadie had to go potty once and we stopped at a rest stop and made everyone try to go just in case. We were back in the car and on the road for about 30 more minutes- while I was reading my book, "How to listen to God" by Charles Stanley. We were going up a hill and all the sudden Jeff started slowing down. I looked up and said whats wrong, and he said I don't know but the car is not wanting to go up this hill and shift gears. So we pulled over...in.the.middle.of.nowhere. And we had no cell service. We both got out of the car- thankfully the kids didn't question too much of what was going on at this point. Jeff lifted the hood...and there was A LOT of smoke pouring out of there. He checked the oil- it was really low! Which I found odd because I just had the oil changed not too long before. There could have been a leak though. A nice young guy from Colorado pulled over and said he would take Jeff to a town a few miles away to get some more oil.

I knew Jeff had to go because we had no other choice- but the thought of being on the side of the road in a broken down van with 3 kids and no cell service made me FREAKED OUT! So I prayed...a lot...for like 30 minutes straight. We sat in the hot car with the doors locked...when I knew it would be close to time for Jeff to be back I opened my door for a few to let the breeze in. Finally they were back..the guy had to get to work, so he let Jeff out with the oil and took off. Jeff put the oil in and things seemed better, but we knew we needed to get it fixed, so we would go slow into the town of Lusk, Wyoming.

Everyone had to go potty so we went to the grocery store. While there Jeff asked the workers if they could recommend a mechanic because the one he got the oil from was less then stellar. We didn't have alot of choices, but I believe the Lord took us to the right one!

TO BE CONTINUED...

A Love Story...Part 2

I forgot to mention in Love Story...Part 1, that we HAD seen pictures of each other...this was back when you waited for the picture to load and it started at the top and went down down till you could see it. I remember watching as his face was slowly uncovered...it got to his eyes and I was smitten...then when I saw the whole thing whoa baby!!! What a hottie...and guess what?!! He was 24!!!! A MAN!!!!

I agreed to go out for coffee with him on February 11 (this date will be significant later in our lives). I told him he could pick me up at my house but had to meet my parents first. He agreed. I spent a lot of time getting ready and looking cute. He finally got there but it had been a windy day so his hair looked different then the picture I had seen, so I got a wee bit nervous. He just looked over-all different that night- so it caught me off-guard. Plus I was meeting a guy from the internet- which at the time was weird. I took him in to meet my parents- I think maybe he said hi but at least they got a good look at him in case I never came home! We got in his older BMW and off we went headed to Latte 101...a coffee shop near both our neighborhoods; that back in the day was pretty awesome! On the way there he went a different way then I usually go- this way goes by an empty field and some dark streets...immediately I knew...

I was dead.

Gone.

This guy was gonna kill me and dump my body...

but, alas, we made it to Latte 101- he just went the back way..fee-you!!! I was still alive! We had a nice time drinking our coffee and chatting. I made him show me his driver's license!! Sure enough- he was born on August 24...I was born on his 5th birthday!! I think we stayed till they closed- then we went back to my house and watched a movie...but we talked the whole time! He headed home around 1 in the morning!

*side note* (my mom had told me about how she kept a journal the whole time she dated my dad- so I got to thinking I would start a journal of our dates and time together- I had never done this with any other guys before)

He called me the next day but was leaving that weekend for a youth conference to be a counselor. He did call me on his cell phone at least once every day while he was gone. The day he got home he called and we went out right away!

We chatted again and set up another date. While we were chatting he asked me if the next time he saw me if he could hold my hand. I said yes...and thought, "OMG who asks if he could hold a girls hand??- how cute this that!?!" The next time I saw him, I waited. And waited. And waited- For him to grab my hand. I know he did eventually but I am pretty sure it was close to the end of the date!!

We went on a few dates after that- then on Feb 23- 12 days after our first date- he finally kissed me!! (I know finally right after 12 days..but we saw each other so much I thought he never would!!) That same night I asked him how many children he wanted (what?? this was important to me!!- remember the whole fall in love and have lots of babies thing??) He said he wanted as many as he could afford! Ha! (Too funny because by America's standards we cannot even afford 1!)

We were both in college at this point and he was way more serious about it then I was...so if I wanted to see him I had to show up at whatever coffee shop he was studying at and study right along with him!! Needless to say my grades greatly improved second semester!!

On March 16 Jeffrey called me and told me his grandmother past away. I was so sad for him and sad I never got to meet her. He would be back in a week...a week?!?!? We had been dating a month and to a 19 yr old girl who was smitten...this was an eternity!! You better believe the day he got home he came over ASAP!! We only saw each other for about an hour, but that was enough!!

From then on we had busy schedules and tried to fit in some dates here and there...I think getting my wisdom teeth out was in there somewhere too...we just did the dating thing and got to know each other better...I knew pretty quick that I loved him. We had some major discussions about the whole love thing...he at one point said when I say it I want to REALLY mean it...so I knew he wanted to be sure...which was fine with me..so I waited...and I waited...I thought by Christmas surely he would say it..you know as a gift to me...but no..not yet..so I waited..and I waited....

To Be Continued...

A Love Story...Part 1

 Long, Long Ago...in a village far away there lived a princess...j/k...(well maybe not)...

I grew up in Southern California and had just finished up my first semester at the junior college- which I bombed!!! You actually had to study and work at college...who knew??!! I was 19 and had dated a few guys in high school- nothing serious, just casual dating. I knew though that I hated dating..I just wanted to fall in love, get married and have lots of babies!! I was pretty strong in my Christian faith, and decided I would ask the Lord to only send me my husband because this dating stuff was for the birds! So I strayed away from seeking out men and just did my work and school thing.

I was still living at home (perk of Junior College) and a friend called and said her and some other people were going to Disneyland soon (one of the people was a guy I had dated) and wanted me to come along cause he might still be interested and it would be fun! I decided I was up for it- who knows maybe it should have been something more serious! My friend was going to spend the night and we were going to wake up early and head out. I had to get something out of the garage that was high on a shelf - I went out barefoot- and as I was getting this thing (I don't remember what I was getting) a plastic boot that my mom had worn on her leg when she broke her ankle fell and hit my foot. (ironic?) Immediately my big toe is spewing blood...like straight up in the air..all over the place. I get it under control before I pass out- I pass out very easily! It is decided there is no way I can walk around Disneyland. I am super bummed, like REALLY bummed out and crying. Disneyland is fun even at 19 and even after you have been a million times, so I was so sad not to get to go.

In my mopyiness I decide to get online (this was 14 years ago- not much available so when I say online it was AOL) my screen name was ShopChic5- (I don't exist on AOL anymore so don't go looking) I am browsing around- not really sure what exactly I was doing; when I get an instant message from a Jeffrey330...what a nice guy he was!! We chatted for a while and I asked how he found me- he said he searched for girls in our small town that were Christians and had the same birthday as him...I didn't believe him on the same birthday thing!! And we chatted for a few days online only finding out we had A LOT in common; both our mom's were teachers, we both were going to school to be teachers, we lived a few blocks from each other but had never met,we knew a lot of the same people, we went to the same high school just at different times and LOTS more!! He kept teasing me saying when are we gonna meet- and there was NO WAY I was going to meet this guy in real life!!! I did agree that I would call him about a week after he found me online- when we talked our online conversation just seemed to continue- getting to know each other better...and boy did he have a nice voice...it was DREAMY!!!! We would talk for literally hours on the phone- way past bedtime. Then it had been long enough- the boy wanted to MEET the girl!!!! I finally agreed....

TO BE CONTINUED....

Pray for our city...

Our city is basically on fire right now. We are about 5 or so miles east of where it is burning so are not being evacuated yet. We are east of our major interstate so it would have to get pretty crazy to jump the highway. It got pretty crazy last night though so anything is possible. A lot of people we know have been evacuated and some are even fearful that their homes are burned to the ground. We are praying without ceasing that this thing can get under control and out before too much more is lost. We have lost our beloved Flying W Ranch- a city favorite! Its an old western town where you can go for a tour, a chuckwagon dinner, and a cowboy show. It is so much fun- and I am sad to think we never were able to take the kids to see it. Colby went as a baby with us, but we never made it back there. Please pray for the City of Colorado Springs, for the displaced families, for the firefighters and all the people helping to fight this thing. We have a good chance for some rain today- so pray it comes and it helps! Will keep you posted!

Mother's Day

Psalm 127:3-5

Behold, children are a gift of the LORD,
         The fruit of the womb is a reward.

Like arrows in the hand of a warrior,
         So are the children of one’s youth.

How blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them;
         They will not be ashamed
         When they speak with their enemies in the gate.

I have been a mama for 8 years...Mr. C made me a mama!! I love my children more than anything in the world- I was born for this job! My children bring me so much joy. I am blessed to be their mama and to share this job of parenting with my help-mate! He is an amazing husband and daddy to our children. I also have had a wonderful role-model of motherhood given to me in the form of my own mom. She is an amazing mom! She spoils me big time on a special day that is meant for both of us. (I stopped by to see her today and take her medicine; as she is pretty sick with Pneumonia right now) She always takes the kids shopping for me and they get me awesome gifts. This year I got some jewelry, and a couple dresses. (the dresses are a little short for my taste - but she said they so badly wanted to get me them...I told them they can come with me to pick out something a little longer and they were ok with that!) I also got a gift card for the salon I go to! Told you she spoils me!!! The kids went shopping with daddy and helped him pick me out a gift..he got me some high heel sandals!! He thought they were pretty fun to shop with! We went to church this morning and out to lunch. The weather is very gloomy today so we have been cuddling at home with popcorn and a movie. Mr. and Mr. C are going to make me biscuits and gravy for dinner...woo hoo!!! I have been so blessed by my family this year! I love them all to pieces.  Here is a picture from lunch today, as well as some pictures from the Mother's Day tea party with Miss S's preschool class. We had a very fun time! Enjoy!

Winding down...

Our school year activities are slowly coming to a close. This mama is a little happy about that since I am a major homebody!!

Here are pictures from the kids Awana program & Awards ceremonies. Mr. C made me one proud mama- he finished up his third year book this year, as well as doing the review and the extra credit cards...after that they made up an extra-extra credit book for him that had about 45 more verses in it. He blew that out of that water too!! He would say 6-7 verses each week all from memory including where it was found. He got a beautiful plaque for finishing his 3 years in Sparks!
Miss H finished her first year book, the review section and the extra credit cards- she also had the same extra-extra credit book as Mr. C and finished that up as well. She received her 1st year book ribbon.
Miss S finished her first Cubby year.
After they got their Awards we celebrated with ice cream!!! Yummy!!

Trust in Him

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight"
Proverbs 3:5-6

Sara